Friday, March 8, 2013

Nanny Bloomberg Asks for Ideas for New Pay Phone Design

I decided to follow Mayor Michael "Nanny" Bloomberg on Twitter just for fun.  One of his recent tweets asked the common man for ideas for a new style pay phone in NY, NY.  Here's my tweet back to him: "We need one that shoots taser electrodes out of it if the user is drinking a Big Gulp, then dials 911."

The "smart" pay phone should do the same if anyone is:
  • carrying an assault rifle
  • carrying a concealed weapon
  • carrying a weapon holding more than 10 rounds
  • carrying any object with which they might defend themselves against violent offenders or sodomites
  • smoking
  • eating a candy bar
  • eating a piece of non-free-range chicken
  • obese
  • overweight
  • underweight
  • homely
  • conservative
  • reasonable
  • married to or dating a person of the opposite sex
  • patriotic
  • a military veteran
  • active duty military
  • caucasian
  • Christian
  • intelligent
  • freedom loving
  • a believer in the Constitution
  • an NRA member
  • a friend of Glenn Beck
  • Glenn Beck
  • wearing yellow
Bloomberg is a moron, and doubly so because he thinks people like you and I are morons because we think we're smart enough to take care of ourselves.
Sorry Mr. Bloomberg, I think I can decide what I put in my pie hole and all my other orifices.  And you can put your paternalism in your stinky one.

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