Thursday, August 26, 2010

What to Feed a Dog and Three-Year-Old White Christian Male Human

A couple weeks ago I had to leave my dog and three-year-old son with an un-named caretaker... After realizing there was no more dog food in the house, the caretaker broke out the chicken nuggets.  My poor dog came back looking like a tick in a coma.

Speaking of my son, the caretaker set a soft stick of butter and a spoon in front of him because the dog ate all the chicken nuggets.  Poor little guy also swelled up, got his first case of acne (at age 3) and slipped into a quasi-concious state, mumbling something about Umizoomi.  No wonder butter is a main constituent in Afghan brownies - it's a hallucinogen.

Quiz:

What do you feed a dog when you run out of dog food?

What do you feed a white male Christian toddler when your dog eats all the chicken nuggets?

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